30 Days of Truth-- Muse Style

I will be starting this in the new future. I got the list from Scarett who cites that this is running crazy on Blogger right now. I will be doing this every so often for awhile. I'm using this as a muse. I said I was would be musing on this blog and so far, very little musing has actually happened. So, let's get to it! Here is the game plan, what will be my 30 days of truth.

Day 01 → Something you hate about yourself.
Day 02 → Something you love about yourself.
Day 03 → Something you have to forgive yourself for.
Day 04 → Something you have to forgive someone for.
Day 05 → Something you hope to do in your life.
Day 06 → Something you hope you never have to do.
Day 07 → Someone who has made your life worth living for.
Day 08 → Someone who made your life hell, or treated you like shit.
Day 09 → Someone you didn’t want to let go, but just drifted.
Day 10 → Someone you need to let go, or wish you didn’t know.
Day 11 → Something people seem to compliment you the most on.
Day 12 → Something you never get compliments on.
Day 13 → A band or artist that has gotten you through some tough ass days. (write a letter.)
Day 14 → A hero that has let you down. (letter)
Day 15 → Something or someone you couldn’t live without, because you’ve tried living without it.
Day 16 → Someone or something you definitely could live without.
Day 17 → A book you’ve read that changed your views on something.
Day 18 → Your views on gay marriage.
Day 19 → What do you think of religion? Or what do you think of politics?
Day 20 → Your views on drugs and alcohol.
Day 21 → (scenario) Your best friend is in a car accident and you two got into a fight an hour before. What do you do?
Day 22 → Something you wish you hadn’t done in your life.
Day 23 → Something you wish you had done in your life.
Day 24 → Make a playlist to someone, and explain why you chose all the songs. (Just post the titles and artists and letter)
Day 25 → The reason you believe you’re still alive today.
Day 26 → Have you ever thought about giving up on life? If so, when and why?
Day 27 → What’s the best thing going for you right now?
Day 28 → What if you were pregnant or got someone pregnant, what would you do?
Day 29 → Something you hope to change about yourself. And why.
Day 30 → A letter to yourself, tell yourself EVERYTHING you love about yourself

Wow.

Today while driving home from class, I was listening to the radio like I often do. The female radio host mentioned an article found on Marie Claire online mentioning something about no one wanting to watch fatties on tv. I finally found the article she was talking about when I did a Google search. Apparently this is a very hot topic. The author has even made an "update" on the blog entry. (found here)

I read the blog entry and the "update". And then I just kind of sat in stunned silence. My first thought was that if people really couldn't stand watching "fatties" on tv they shouldn't watch that show.

But then I got mad. There are over-weight and obese people out there who are kind, caring, and deserve love. (Just like there are other kinds of people out there under-represented on tv.) Why shouldn't there be a show about that? We have shows about some bimbo who lives in Jersey? Why not a nice couple who falls in love and have similarities? Who cares if those similarities are that they are overweight?

I think there need to be more shows with over-weight actors. Not everyone in the world has a perfect physique. Or even a desirable one. In fact, if you look around women come in all shapes and sizes. However, if the only thing that survives from our species are the television shows, whoever discovers them thousands of years from now will think all women were size 2, tall, and had incredible skin and hair. This, as we all know, is not true.

So what do you think? What kinds of additional diversity does tv need? Do you like seeing the over-weigh actors or would you prefer not to? Or do you not care? Do you just watch tv shows based on theme?

Why do I want to be a teacher?

This was a journal I was required to do towards the beginning of the semester for my Intro to Education class. I thought I would share it with you guys here. :-) 

I hate questions like this. It’s kind of like asking me, “Why do you love chocolate?” Well, I… I… I don’t know. I just do. It was that way for me when I first pondered this question. Why do I want to be a teacher? I can think of a few cheesy, cliché reasons, but I don’t want to use those as real reasons and many of the traditional reasons don’t fit me either. For example, it’s true that I love children, but I don’t want to teach students who will think of themselves as children. The students I want to teach are just on the cusp of adulthood. They think they are all grown up and have little left to learn. They’ll think they are ready to face the world and all the challenges in it, like we each did at sixteen. So this, already, sounds like a challenge. Luckily, I like being challenged. So that’s a reason. I want to be a teacher because it will be challenging.

Therefore, I want to be a teacher so that every day I walk into that classroom, I will be pushed, both by myself and my students, to give my best. I will be challenged to give them work that will mean something and in this will be giving my own life meaning. I want to push my students to edit, analyze, and think in ways that they may not have before. I want to prepare students to learn for a lifetime and not merely memorize facts for a test. I hope to learn from my students and adapt to what they need to know to survive in the world past high school. I want to be a teacher so I can make a difference in the world. I would like to help children who may not have previously thought they could attend college realize that dream. It would be great to be sited as the inspiration and reason behind the future of our nation. I want to be a teacher for all the students who are hungry to learn and hungry to succeed but people have told them they can’t and won’t succeed or learn. I want to be at the very least, the one positive light in my student’s lives. I hope to be the one who will always stand in their corner and fight for them and what’s best for them.

I realize this sounds very lofty and idyllic, but I think that in order to be a teacher one needs to have strong ideas of how he or she would like the future be. Every day, teachers impact the shaping of the future for better or for worse through his or her interactions with students. I believe that if one does not have the heart or stomach for politics, the best way to help shape our country and impact it’s future is by working directly with our youth.

What do I have to give?

Disclaimer: This entire post may sound selfish and delusional. It probably is.

Today while grocery shopping, there was a woman standing with a sign on cardboard that said "NEED HELP". I consider myself a kind, considerate human being. So you're probably wondering why I drove by without stopping to help said woman. Well, it goes back longer than just today.

This woman used to stand by the stop sign at Wal-Mart. With the same cardboard sign. I'm always wondering how if these people were in such of a need of assistance, how they got the markers to write on their sign and the scissors to cut it into a perfect square. She also would stand in 100F weather and rub her arms and jump around like she was cold. I'm sorry, but it's blistering hot out and there is no way you are cold delusional woman. Also, she wears decent clothes. Not super nice ones, but they are always clean and they never have holes. Her hair also appears clean and it looks like she brushes it regularly. She also obviously gets her hair cut because it's looked the same for about the last year since I first noticed her.

In addition to this woman, there was also a man sitting in the McDonald's inside Wal-Mart. He had a sign detailing where he needed to go in Minnesota. I'd like to think if I were going to Minnesota, I'd have helped him but the truth is I wouldn't.

I thought about this. WHY? Why do I, as a social-rights activist, caring individual, and mostly Christian (see previous post on religious beliefs) not stop and help him? Or her? Even the first time I saw her, I never spared a dollar for her. In fact, I think I locked my door.

This makes me feel guilty. I should be more willing to help people. But what can a hand out really do? There are places in Ames for people to go. There are homeless shelters, food pantries, and the Dept of Human Services has an office here as well. 

Let's face it. These are tough economic times, but Will and I are living a reasonable comfortable time. Things are rough since I'm not working but at least we have a root over our head and food on our table. We even go to the dollar theater to see a movie a few times a month and out to the bar with friends once a month. In order to be a good person am I supposed to give up these tiny fun things we do to help others?

The answer inside of me is a resounding "NO!" But why? Why do I feel such a strong feeling of no against those who could need my help? The answer is, I'm afraid that everyone with a sign is just looking to mooch off the kindness and generosity of others. I'd be willing to bet I won't see that woman once it gets below 20. She'll be in her HUD-assisted housing, eating her food stamps meals and surviving just fine. Hell, maybe she doesn't get either of those because she makes more money out there with her little sign that my husband does contributing to society.

Also, I don't have to be generous with money. I am generous with my time and my used goods. I donate all clothes, books, and other goods that I will no longer be using to Goodwill. I also buy a lot of my books, goods, and some of my clothes there as well. I am generous with my time in a volunteer when I get a chance. I volunteered at the Ames Public Library 5 hours a month last academic year and this summer I helped hand out water when the public water was off in Ames. I also have worked in soup kitchens and gone on mission trips. I'd like to go through training with the Red Cross. So, I'm not a bad person, I just don't hand out money.

So let's put it this way, people out there begging for hand outs piss me off. There are services that can assist people and there are jobs out there if you're that desperate. (I just can't work over-nights at McDonald's or the like because I go to school and I'd never see my husband. So when I say I can't find a job, I can't find a job where I could go to school and see my husband and still be able to work.) I should quit my whining. I have food for dinner, a nice place to sleep, and clean clothes. AND a family that would allow us to crash on their couches if it ever came to that.

So now, I feel guilty about writing this whole thing. I'm tempted not to publish it, but menh. That's how I feel. Take it or leave it.

[witty blog post]

Here is a holder spot for the awesome blog post I will write tonight when I get done with class. It will most likely include a snarky, hating on local-PD vibe. If you need more until I'm able to write it, see here.

Until then, have a good day! :-)

10&10

Okay. I'll admit it. I just squealed in pleasure when I realized that I was number 9 on "Thoughts of an Oxymoron"s 10&10 (a little bit of love). I mean, wow. A shout out from a smart lady who I adore. What's better than that? I realize I saw this almost a week late, but it's midterm week.  I shouldn't be taking the time to even write this, but I will anyway, because I deserve it.

Ten Things I Like:

1. Chuck Taylors. They have been ingrained as part of my identity since I was 14. I'm not giving them up until I'm 74.
2. Books. New books, old books, I'm not picky. The smell of the library or a bookstore. It's like... paper. And knowledge. Both of which are fantastic.
3. Diet root beer. I used to be an avid hater of all diet sodas, however, diet root beer tastes much like the regular thing, has 0 calories, and helps erase (some of) the guilt from drinking soda. I'm even getting used to diet Mountian Dew.
4. Waffles. Both the breakfast food and my best friend on four legs. My dog is the only one in my life who thinks I'm a saint, never holds grudges, and always thinks I have the answer. 
5. Music. I don't think I could live without a rhythm of some sort pulsing through my veins. I often has one in mind even when no music surrounds me. 
6. A bargain. A super-cute top on clearance for $3.99 at Old Navy? Gets me every time. 
7. HGTV. What is better than fantasizing about houses in tropical locales or half-a-million-dollar houses I'll never afford on my future teacher's salary? Or decorating ideas that I can incorporate into my own apartment? Nothing. And it's pretty easy to keep on in the background while doing homework. (And doesn't make me eat non-stop like my Food Network obsession did.)
8. Movies. I love curling up under a blanket on the couch with my dog and hubby watching a movie or tv or whatever. (It's really really REALLY cozy with all of us on the couch.)
9. Ice cream. I realize this is the third food-related item on this list, but really... ice cream is something I always associate with my Papa, my mom's father. He is an amazing man and to him a night just isn't a night to him unless it comes complete with ice cream. I have to say I agree. It's like that sweet treat at the end of the day. Though now, I eat a lot of frozen yogurt. It's basically the same thing, right?
10. My family. They are everything to me. My family also now includes a wonderful husband (and his family. I am blessed with awesome in-laws). He hasn't been given a proper introduction yet, but he will. :-)

And now for 10 blogs you should follow, besides me *shameless self-promotion*: (Wait... you are following me, right?)

• Thoughts of an Oxymoron-- Inspiration for today's post and a woman with a LOT going on. All of it fun to read!
• the silver lining-- Positive thoughts and lots of organization. Also my fellow 2010 bride!
• We Three Kings-- I can't say enough good things about Lele. She has an adorable son and plenty to talk about. So you should go check it out.
• domestic daredevils-- A relatively new blog, but worth mentioning for this bread post alone! I look forward to more recipes and kitchen tips!
• (I forgot to put bread on my 10 things I like. So consider bread #11!)
• Confessions of a Shieldmaiden-- I think some of you know of the Shieldmaiden challenge I mentioned over on Twitter to Get Fitter, but this is Scarlett. She is amazing. I love her. And her awesome, geeky exercise idea that I'm currently failing at. But that's not the point... 
• Rachel Vincent-- My favorite fantasy writer. (Yes, I love her stuff more than Twilight! *gasp*) You guys should check out her stuff, seriously. I know I plug it a lot. So DO IT! 
• Hyperbole and a Half-- A blog I've recently discovered, but her illustrations and stories and scenarios are absolutely hilarious. You just have to check it out. 
• The Seam Rippers-- They make me jealous with all their awesome crafty-goodness. I tried to sew when I was young. It's a good idea in theory, but I don't have the patience. :-( So I look at their shiny projects in awe. 
• Mommy Wants Vodka-- Firstly, who doesn't want vodka? Secondly, you had me at John C. Mayer. I was wondering what happened to wittiness and why it wasn't on my Twitter feed anymore! Also, I can't wait to see more of what she writes.
• For number 10, I'm pulling an Erin. Please follow the other blogs I do. :-)

And now, enough procrastination. It's time to get back to homework!